{"id":29934,"date":"2021-03-02T08:00:51","date_gmt":"2021-03-02T08:00:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/?p=29934"},"modified":"2021-03-02T08:02:24","modified_gmt":"2021-03-02T08:02:24","slug":"elin-williams-the-mind-body-split","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/elin-williams-the-mind-body-split\/","title":{"rendered":"Elin Williams: the mind\/body split"},"content":{"rendered":"

Disability talk<\/strong> blog post: <\/span>The mind\/body split<\/a>, by Elin Williams<\/span><\/p>\n

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\"\"As a chronically ill workaholic, I have a slight problem. My mind and my body don\u2019t always cooperate.<\/p>\n

One races through the to-do list,\u00a0 whilst the other demands rest. One produces a new idea just as the other retaliates. One likes to think it\u2019s invincible, whilst the other, well, the other has plenty of evidence in its arsenal to prove otherwise.<\/p>\n

I give you The Mind\/Body Split.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ironically, I\u2019m experiencing this conflict as we speak; interrupting what should deservedly be a restful afternoon with intermittent bouts of writing as my mind gravitates towards this idea and all it wants to say about it.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a peculiar divide.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d like to think that I have this enduring loyalty to looking after my body, to listening to its cries when things get a little too much. But I have to hold my hands up and say that I\u2019m not always committed to dedicating the care it needs and deserves.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s an almost constant battle; the split stretches into a chasm, leaving space for some peculiar emotions to swell. For years, the commitment between my mind and body to look out for each other has been puckered and bruised.<\/p>\n

When I\u2019m too weak to do anything, my mind feels guilty for not being productive. When I attempt a small task, my body quivers under the strain.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve always placed unnecessary pressure on myself in terms of my work, my studies, my writing, and doing the best I can…<\/p>\n

…Every day unfolds in different directions when it comes to The Mind\/Body Split: Sometimes, a splash of common sense exists between them, making it easier to mould the shape of the day into something that will satisfy them both.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

But some are harder than others. My ME\/CFS symptoms fluctuate from one day to the next, sometimes gripping me from the moment I wake up, whilst, on others, they progress as the hours stretch on. Take the other day, for example: It was early afternoon when a thicker veil of weakness started to cascade over me, alerting me to the fact that it was time for a break, time to stop. But did I?<\/p>\n

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I did not.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Here is where I\u2019d usually find myself typing carefully constructed explanations, but honestly? It was simply a matter of that newly accepted task being too tantalising to dismiss. It needed to be done, and I knew the worry of completing it would eat away at my energy whilst resting, just as an extra 20 minutes at my desk would.<\/p>\n

So I stayed.<\/p>\n

You\u2019d think that I\u2019d be quite the pro at navigating this whole ME\/CFS experience, having lived with the symptoms in various forms for the best part of the last ten years, but consistent evidence proves that I am very much\u00a0not.\u00a0<\/em>I barely touch intermediate.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s this hierarchy that gets me. The way in which both entities fight for superiority: The way I let the thought of productivity erode the precious concept of rest. Or the way in which the layering of symptoms makes it impossible to see a task or an activity through.<\/p>\n

Because, my mind doesn\u2019t always take the lead. Sometimes the thoughts are cast in the symptom of brain fog, or my arms are too heavy, too weak, to reach for the laptop.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve become better at accepting these moments, better at submitting to resting when I need to.<\/p>\n

But over-exertion is still a constant threat, and I know I need to make more of a conscious effort to diminish its presence…<\/p>\n

Read the full article<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/h3>\n

Black tulip beauty:<\/strong>\u00a0Elin Williams on life with vision impairment and CFS<\/a><\/h3>\n

Elin’s blog<\/strong>: My blurred world<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Disability talk blog post: The mind\/body split, by Elin Williams   As a chronically ill workaholic, I have a slight problem. My mind and my body don\u2019t always cooperate. One races through the to-do list,\u00a0 whilst the other demands rest. … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[6626],"class_list":["post-29934","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news","tag-elin-williams"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5qkYK-7MO","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29934","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29934"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29934\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30017,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29934\/revisions\/30017"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29934"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29934"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wames.org.uk\/cms-english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29934"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}